This is real. This is me.

when the smallest things would go wrong it would mean the end of the world. 

I keep having a reoccurring dream that I am at my old house. I dreamed of my old house AND my old car. The dream interpreter said that dreaming of my old childhood home reflects my desire of building a family, which is true to an extent. I don’t want to build one now, but I very much do later on in life. Also, I have some feelings and unexpressed emotions that are now being triggered by a waking situation. I don’t know about that. Well, I do have a lot of unexpressed emotions. I rather not be seen as a basket case of emotions like every other girl.

Maybe I miss home a lot. Maybe I can’t wait to get the hell out of this place. YES. 

I can’t believe I will be going home soon. I came to SA with many things at hand, and i’m leaving with more than I can handle and some things missing. bleh.

When you hold in bad comments to yourself, does that count as holding in emotions? That isn’t the type of person I am so if I don’t have anything nice to say, I try not to say them..

But one day I feel like I am going to have this massive word vomit, and it won’t look pretty. 

-found dress
-got nail polish
-got my computer but managed to lock myself out of it

yeah yeah. I should studying for those finals..boo.

I made more cookies. I can’t wait to become obese. 

FIND graduation dress….and pretty nail polish! :)

LOVE not having class!

askaida:

I never thought I would be quoting the Jonas Brothers but this quote gets me. 

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NICK JONASSSS <3

will be taken from me the instant I move back home. 

After my advisor meeting, well after ALL my advising meetings I walk away feeling that reality sucks and I have such a long way from where I am supposed to be.

One more year of college. Hopefully. I applied to U of H today. Hopefully I get in? lol My next semester will consist of busting my ass making A’s in all the classes I didn’t make A’s in. 
 
I added another class to my summer schedule. 3 classes. fuckkk. 

Next Semester
-Full course load
-studying for the DAT
-taking the DAT in the winter
-Full Spring course load 

Life as I know it will be dunskis.  

SAD FACE. This is the only thing that has been running through my mind all day. How to deal?

I can’t be anymore scared about the future. 

that gets me roused up is arguing about marijuana.  It’s like arguing about religion with me. Those are two things I rather not waste my time arguing about because it will go nowhere. There is no point in trying to convince someone that smoking weed is bad for you and there is no point trying to convince someone that there is a God. So I choose not to argue for the sake of arguing. 

When you hear “studies show..” who are these people studying this shit? People you don’t know..people who could have a degree in something but could be someone stupid as shit. You can’t always believe what you hear, or what you read. Study your shit yourself. Get educated instead of listening to other peoples opinions. haha

Yada yada yada.  

It has been the best Monday this year.

-Slept in
-Grocery shopped
-Cooked lunch
-Layed out by the pool
-Baked chocolate chip cookies and cream cookies

YAY. 

and then its over…sorta.

I need a break! please!

I don’t ask for much at all. I just want a certain amount of respect. I could care less about the small details. ughhhhh.

i’ve been watching the hills all day. someone save me.

wtffff

studying and spaghetti! :( tears.

Besides my cell bio final exam I have tomorrow that i’m procrastinating studying for..

-I got my test back that I didn’t think I did well on and I had the highest grade. 
-Did wayy better than I expected on the multiple choice part of my physics exam but  i’m still waiting on the other half
-My box came in today which was requested yesterday so I could send my computer in to get fixed..so it may not be such a long wait to get it fixed!
-aannd Glee is on tonight!

feeling gooood. :) don’t mess it up!

I wonder I’d it will ever get old with me? Well, I hope not. Awwww!

askaida:

That I like the smell of my……

-room

-paper

………and my armpits?

…to spend indoors studying. Joy. :) 2 lab finals this week. Can’t wait for the end of the week….

someone tells me its weird again..i’ll kill em.

I don’t like it when people tell me what to do.

geeezdar:

Walked in the rain without an umbrella. Looking sad. Yeeeaaaahhhhh.

I do that all the time. I had an umbrella today though and I laughed at the emo people who didn’t. suckkaaas!

I HATE this feeling. The feeling of being totally drained from cramming for an exam. Or exam(s) in my case. I just want to go home and sleep in my bed! Too bad I have more shit to do, but I don’t care anymore. I think I am going to crash for the next 30 mins before my test. I can’t retain anymore of this nonsense anymore. 

AND its raining. I hate walking back and forth through campus in this damned weather! 

geeezdar:

(via whiterice)

Does that mean you’re pregnant? haha

HAHAHAHA. Yes, its your babies. :)

(via askaida)

I don’t know why but I keep listening to sad break up songs lately. It’s weird.  

thought I was in love with Puck, but i’m 100% for Finn. Gah, he is so damn sexy, especially at the end of the episode where he said he doesn’t give up easily. I easily jizzed in my pants. 

Damn, I just realized that I have another test on Thursday on top of the physics exam I have to do really well on. I also have a paper to write and a presentation tomorrow I have barely prepared for. Oh, and 2 finals next week! wtf.

Oh well I still have a feeling that I will get through it okay.

I finally got lady gaga tickets, my mom also said I could go to Cali this summer, and Glee premieres tonight. So, those are def the highlights of my day. Duh, good and bad have to always equal out.

I had coffee this morning, took an addy, and now I’m drinking a venti green tea. That means no sleep and pissing every five minutes. Yay.

then I revolve my mind around it till it becomes realistic. I freak the fuck out, and after a while I let it go. There seriously is too much bad shit in this world and fear becomes your best friend. 

I need to stop watching shows with far out story lines. 

 

Don’t we ask God for way more than we Thank Him for? Be appreciative for the good that is always present in our Life.

-latest Rob Kardashian tweet. Gosh, can you stop being anymore sexy?

The only time weed would affect my relationship is if it were chosen over me. Hell naw.

when I can speak really really fast and the other person can understand me perfectly. I feel like I can be myself more. Hahaha.

and I feel like the world is going to tumble down on me.

This week looks like its going to be a pain in the ass.

I have a presentation which i’ve barely prepared for, and a test I haven’t even started studying for. And shit in between.

I hate Mondays.

good things turning bad…

I want to be forever 21.

pre sale tickets are sold out for gaga.

asdhnjklhjlaksdhajwuiehhhaj!

It makes it hard for a person to walk out the door. 

PARANOIA! 

to get Lady Gaga tickets. UGH. The first concert my mom is willing to help me get, and nothing. I was looking for cheaper tickets but that wasn’t working and maybe pulled a few 85 dollar tickets, but wasn’t informed that my mom would spring for them until it was too late. FML. EPIC fail. I am very sad :( Oh well…..you win some, you lose some.

I just realized how hectic my week would be last minute. But it’s times like these where it feels even more amazing when you get everything done and still succeed. Well, hopefully I do. It’s worked all this semester.

My car cost way too much to fix. GAH. 

I need to pay for my Defensive Driving.

All inconveniences. I can deal.

I lovee my Mommy. She made the inconveniences a little be tolerable. 

Goodnight..actually, needs to finish my shiettt. :(

 

Tickets go on sale Friday! I’m trying to get pre sale tickets now but I refuse to pay 400 dollars for 2 tickets damn it.

need a stronger cup. 

too strong=bouncing off the walls.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Easter Sunday. I know I did. Perfect weekend to be exact. It was totally worth calling in sick, nothing can beat it. 

Last night I went to Rice Village with the peeps. It was toooo fun. No more Patron for me though. Tequila ALWAYS makes me gag when I drink it. That is one of the worst feelings ever.

I woke up for church and went to a packed mass. It was very nice though. I couldn’t help but be thankful for everything I have. After that, celebrated with the family and my Aunts birthday and played with the baby. I LOVEEE BABIES! :)

Overall, spectacular day! Now, if my parents will stop being Asian and let me go out, i’m gonna go hang with the significant other. My mom requested that whenever he wants to see me that he needs to come to my house and pick me up instead of me meet him in the middle of nowhere. Cause thats what he does? Oh mommaaa. lol

Dreading SA tomorrow :(